As soon as the first few flakes begin to tumble from the pewter skies, reporters dive into their dressing-up boxes and emerge with a variety of scarves and anoraks.

They are then despatched to different 'white hells' in various parts of the country to file identical reports.

"Here in Yorkshire, lorries have jack-knifed, schools have been closed, commuters have arrived at stations to find no trains running and cars have been abandoned."

In the ensuing ten minutes, you discover that in the north, the midlands, the home counties and along the south coast, lorries, schools, commuters and cars have all suffered the same fate.

That's the problem with snow. It makes everything look the same and causes identical problems wherever it falls – a fact which appears to elude most news editors.

They are determined to wring every last ounce of human drama out of a few inches of snow, despite the fact an abandoned van in a ditch on the outskirts of Scarborough looks remarkably similar to an abandoned van in a ditch on the outskirts of High Wycombe.

At this point such events should cease to be regarded as news, but that does not prevent reporters ('I'm not wearing a hat darling, snow in the hair looks so dramatic') from pretending they are the first to witness such tragedy.

On the BBC, Sophie Raworth opted to read her autocue from the warmth
of the studio, before making the statement that 'a full weather forecast follows at the end of the programme' sound like the imminent announcement of World War III.

ITV's Mary Nightingale decided to brave the elements and reported live from St Peter's Square in Manchester where there was (yes, you've guessed it) lots of snow but not many people.

In her posh winter coat and impeccable make-up, she looked like Lady Penelope abandoned in Biarritz after a good night out.

But this was a dramatic event and she was determined to rise to the occasion. "This is a city under siege," she intoned.

In fact, it looked like a city that had gone home for its Horlicks.


The leader with stickability

You have to give Gordon Brown his due. He may be a sitting target for the opposition (in both parties) but he has an uncanny ability to roll with the punches.

Minutes before PMQs he was informed of the latest attempt to unseat him as leader. He may have sagged a little from the initial impact – but came roaring forwards with both fists flailing.

A punch-bag punching back? David Cameron seemed unsettled by the role reversal and lost this week's encounter on points.

Perhaps Labour have unwittingly discovered the answer to electoral success. They just need to keep poking their leader with a sharp stick.


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