We’re down to the quarter-finals and the BBC lads are still stuck in Salford.
Rumours they’d move the set to the host nations for the knockout stages have proved false at this stage, and one of the upshots is their coverage still seems a little flat.
Why does Shearer keep to-ing and fro-ing between the sides of pitches in Poland, the Ukraine and the studio back home?
And do we learn anything from the chats he and Jake Humphrey have?
It was Portugal versus the Czech Republic last night: cue much BBC head-scratching about which famous Portuguese or Czech pundit they could plonk in the middle of Messrs Hansen and Dixon. After much debate they shipped in Jürgen Klinsmann.
Next time ‘the BBC’s favourite German’ is on, close your eyes and listen to him – he sounds like Milan Mandaric speeded up, if you can imagine such a thing.
The Beeb were delighted, to a toe-curling extent, that CR7 & Co had made the last eight and won’t be able to contain their joy that he’s now in the semis.
I can’t say SB42 (that’s my age now, and, coincidentally, my squad number the last time I turned out for a Tuesday night kickabout down Medina Primary School in Paulsgrove) shares the enthusiasm.
The BBC love the Brylcreem Boy, don’t they? Pass the sick bag, someone.
The lads in the studio thought he’d been the only player on the pitch, while Jonathan Pearce and Martin Keown were rattling on about the fact he ‘could have had’ seven or eight goals in the tournament.
Well, so could I... had I made it as a professional footballer, got so good I was picked for England (it’s a little-known fact I was just ahead of Rio Ferdinand on Roy’s back-up list) and then scored seven or eight goals out there. But I didn’t and haven’t.
I know he’s a decent player but let’s see if Portugal win it, shall we?
Meanwhile, this is the first BotB since Tuesday’s fun, when it all came good after a first half in which the only thing more frustrating than England’s huffing and puffing was Tyldo and Towno’s grating commentary.
We also had some sorrow-filled reflections on Ireland’s exit.
Roy Keane felt some senior players needed a holiday to reflect on things (so what’s that they’ve been having over the past couple of weeks?).
And Ned Boulting said some of the Ireland players looked like ‘broken men’ after the defeat. Presumably, they’d just realised they’ll be on the BBC panel at World Cup 2014.
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